Sometimes the raw memories of the past gives me pain. The worst part of holding the memories is not the pain. It’s the loneliness of it. I can’t share it with others. I always feel that the memories to be shared and erased but unfortunately I could not find any ways to come out of that. Now, it is difficult for me to catch and forgive the person who hurt me. The toughest part is that I have tried to let go over and over again but unfortunately it comes back again and again. I feel I am left alone. Many people tried to support me. They don’t always know what to say or how to fix it, but their presence is also sometimes disturbing. I have learned that these devastating events hold the most important lessons in life.
Nobody likes being alone that much. I don’t go out of my way to make friends, that’s all. It just leads to disappointment. ~ Haruki Murakami